The Pain - Poem by kadambari kadambari

…I feel breathless..
Breathless out of love,
Breathless out of jealousy?
His soft voice pierced my ears: wish I was deaf…..
His fingers touched the button,
I felt myself suffocating, my lungs pledged for air…
Air? ah…whom I suffer for is the one I seek?
Was not love the forbidden fruit..
My lord, I m pained......
I feel my tears come
…..But there aint any.
I feel my heart burst to pieces, but there aint any.
My tongue has suddenly let go of its sensation
Down there I hear him talking with softness to her,
Wretched souls coming to break my peace, why my dear?
Why don’t you talk to me this way?
It’s been years, had u cajoled me……
The female smiled, turned, sat, stood, laughed…………
I felt my nerves wringing off to disappear: my heart,
Grew harder. The pain seemed to make my head swirl,
Had it all that I have been waiting for?
He snapped. The lights flickered to the sound of the clicks,
His eyebrows looked deeply into the lens,
And on to her.
My body felt numb.
I looked down.
A sharp pain sprung from deep down; bottom of my heart.
I feel it slowly rising; like the morning sun, to my throat.
Ah! I fear; what scorching pain …..
Shall it bear upon him if I let go off my words.
Heaven…transcend upon me!
I love him dearly: not to pain him.
If at all the infant bites the mother’s breast,
Will the mother flung her baby?
Tears from my eyes,
All the past pains may reveal..
But now; am I in drought?
Only the rains can give the earth new springs
Or it may go barren and cease to exist.
Help me dear lord; to have,
My salvation drenched to cleanse my miseries.
I pray; give me strength to forget; to forgive…..
Oh dear; your eyes betray me not,
With such innocent looks; was it you?
Who did it.
I believe not; your long fingers snapping her
And not me?
What emptiness do you see in me dear?
Tell me; I shall fill it up till my soul dries off.
Oh my dear; do you hear me?
Have my lips not tasted sweet?
Or are my eyes not brilliance?
Don’t you see grace in me?
Or is it that I have no pleasure in me?
What else?
Do your say, my dearest.
Has it all that’s enough for you?
Do you no more seek joy in me?
Ah, all that’s of me,
Shall end.
…if you wish to end thy.
Silence could hurt longer than words.
Deeper the sea may seem
But your stealth of my heart has gone,
Even more deeper.
I seek nor the oceans nor the riches,
I seek you, my dearest.
If words could flow,
Where would the sea’s fame go?
If seas could be empty and happy
I wish to be the sea.
If clouds rain
And if the earth takes it all happily
What if I cry; will you be happy, my dear?
I feel the sudden pressures in my heart,
Lighting up fingers
With pain and sorrow
My mind burns on this paper!

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1The Pain
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